Jay Z : MaNyfaCedGod A Short Film
Written by Delmar Napue
I’m an analytical over thinker. Something I work desperately at to change but deep down I know I won’t. I never learned how to let things in life be, I always assumed there was a formula for every situation. I had faith that the puzzle I constantly stared at and was stumped by would eventually be solved. It wasn’t, nor will it ever be. I’m starting to realize that sometimes in order to truly close the door you have to leave it open. Because maybe it was never your door to close.
“MaNyfaCedGod” is a beautiful title for this short film because it perfectly captures how flimsy the structure you stand on as a man truly is when dealing with women. For me, the word God symbolizes an entity above you, something or someone you aim to serve or please, but It’s hard to please a God without a bible. It’s hard to please a God with a set of unwritten rules or expectations that differs from the next God. I’ve been broken before, I’ve struggled to ask for understanding while putting myself back together and now I’m at a place where all I can ask a women is “What do you want from me?” I no longer have the fuel needed to run in circles and guess what satisfies you.
“I wish women knew how damaged we are by our perception of what a man is supposed to be”. This was one of the opening statements made by Trevor Noah on “MaNyfaCedGod”. A statement that let me know I wasn’t alone in thought or experience. This film hosted black men who are held highest in society as well as black men society wouldn’t look at twice. But they all echoed the same sentiment, we don’t know what we’re supposed to be, or if we’re supposed to be anything in the first place. A few of the men in this film touched on how we clutch at the concept of strength. They talked about a relationship between a man and a woman as more of a war than a safe space. Saying things like “You can’t show no emotion, no fear… it’s a sign of weakness”. At that point if your hesitant to display vulnerability with a women what’s the point of investing in a relationship? Constantly feeling the need to “quantify your tears with a show of strength” as one man puts it is draining on the psyche. Often it’s hard for a man to come to a woman and just put his cards on the table emotionally, so some end up “playing games” or “acting funny” as a subliminal message.
“When I feel like she’s doin somethin I don’t want her to be doin the punishment mechanism is to pull back which innately draws people closer” Not for the same reason but I’ve done this before as well. In my case I wanted to gage how much she cared. Instead of having the emotional maturity needed to simply ask, while also being scared to come off as weak I just decided to fall back. As a man you’re taught through society or wherever else that it’s your job to win the woman over often leaving you looking up and wondering why no one puts effort into securing, leaving you to question what your worth truly is.
“You need help, someone needs to talk you through why your feeling these feelings.” Many stigmas are attached to therapy in the black community. For some it’s a sign that you must be crazy to feel the need to pay someone to tell you about yourself. But many successful people heavily advocates the benefits of therapy and encourage people to go. The problem will never be fixed if you don’t address it.
*Listen to the Stay Woke! Podcast series on Jay-z footnotes videos here